“The best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be.”
-I’m still getting used to this whole “not having a job” thing. I think the weirdest part is when I wake up at 10:30 and think, “Oh, shit! I’m late”, and I spend a few seconds trying to think of an excuse to call in, and then I remember. I mutter an “Oh, yeah…fuck ’em!”, roll over, and go back to sleep. I could actually get used to this.
-On the country station’s morning show today, the question asked was “What invention did you think we’d have by 2010 that we don’t have yet?” Of course, the majority of callers said “flying cars”. Yes, The Jetsons lied to us, but I’m fine with it. Flying cars would be a logistical nightmare! You’d essentially need a pilot’s license, you probably wouldn’t be able to get a permit at 16, and if you think drunk driving accidents look bad now, well…
Anyway, I have a different answer to that question: based on the amount of science fiction to which I’ve been exposed, I thought we’d have trippier, more kick ass drugs, with a real high tech delivery system.
People who know me might be surprised by me saying that, since I’ve never touched a drug in my life (yeah, I’m *that* guy- the one you’re scared to smoke around ’cause you think I might narc on you). Anyway, I’ve seen shit where microchips placed on skin got people high, drug lords were huffing shit out of gas masks, there were even futuristic opium dens (it was bound to make a comeback, just like absinthe). But do we have any of this? NO! Instead, drugs went surprisingly low-tech. The biggest scourge is made in Cletus’s bathtub, and the shit makes your teeth fall out. SCIENCE FAIL!
-What a great night of televised wrestling! We got a taste of the Monday Night Wars of the late 90s, as TNA Impact was a live broadcast, going up against WWE RAW. Why were they going head to head like this? Well, Hulk Hogan debuted on TNA, with a promise to shake things up. Honestly, it just looks like he and Eric Bischoff are just gonna turn it into a tired retread of WCW. There was a parade of washed up has-beens, which was exciting for the TNA crowd. Then again, the TNA set is so cheesy, it looks like something you do while waiting for the taping of your episode of Double Dare.
WWE, however, held much more meaning for me, and probably most long-term wrestling fans. After 12 years away from the WWE, former great Bret “The Hitman” Hart made his return, looking like some drugged out old shaman woman, wanting closure for the unfortunate way that he left the company. If you’re not familiar with “The Montreal Screw Job”, wiki it, but it’s a PRETTY big deal to old school wrestling fans. This was back in the day before the “Attitude Era” and the transparency of wrestling. There was major bad blood between Bret Hart, Shawn Michaels, and WWE Chairman, Vince McMahon. Bret and Shawn made amends at the beginning of the show, capped off by the most uncomfortable bro hug you’ve seen since your big brother caught you in that gay bar last Thanksgiving! We were forced to wait until the end of the show for Bret and Vince to finally have their tete a tete. Vince broke character and really had some nice things to say about Bret. He even nominated Bret’s father for induction into the 2010 Hall of Fame class. It appeared that the Pro Wrestling Berlin Wall had finally been torn down. Vince shook Bret’s hand, raised it in victory, and they faced the four sides of the ring. to rousing applause. And just when wrestling fans across America began to wipe that tear from their eye, Vince kicked Bret in the stomach. ‘Cause that’s the kind of bastard Vince is. Look for Bret to show up regularly in the lead up to Wrestlemania. Why? Because that’s just how this stuff works. Damn, I’ve missed wrestling!
What happened to your job? A month ago you were talking about your office holding a Christmas Adopt-a-Family drive, and now you have no job? I hope it's an alternate plan to a 9-5 grind, and if so, then godspeed.
I guess I don't spend much time thinking about the future, but if I had to, I'd probably have assumed we would have made more headway in space travel, maybe something like artificial gravity. Of course, that requires deeper understanding of the universe than we've got (and potentially violating the laws of physics, but now you're just attacking good storytelling). The drugs thing is pretty good, though, as a whole they can't really get more low-tech. In fact, most drugs that people use are things they've been using for years (see ericw.org for someone with an insane volume of knowledge of drugs).
I'd comment on the wrestling stuff, but I haven't watched it in years.
Hey Stephen! Thanks for reading 🙂
Yeah, no job. I worked for what was basically a glorified call center. I wasn't hitting the numbers they wanted, and they kept stringing me along on "improvement plans". The place had a HORRIBLE turnover rate, so it's not like it caught me by surprise. Still, I've never involuntarily lost a job, so it's certainly been an adjustment (especially when it occurs a week before Christmas and my birthday). Guess it's good I wasn't in that Adopt-A-Family drive, as I was gone before they even delivered the stuff.