I don’t know if I’m built for YouTube. As you know, I’m trying to become more familiar with that platform, but I’ve been falling down some rabbit holes I don’t think I need to be going down. Ya know how you never understood how Fox News brainwashed your Granny? Well, I get it. I totally get it! So far, it’s nothing too bad, though I did watch this report on how it’s believed Jay-Z had Aaliyah killed for rejecting him, and then took on Beyoncé as his “consolation prize”. I don’t know about all that, but they did make some convincing arguments…
I went back to the Vice well this week, and started watching their series The Story Of…, which told the story of popular songs from the early ’00s. In many cases these were one-hit wonders, but Vice does such a good job with the smooth production of these things that you find yourself surprised that you just devoted 22 minutes to discovering the sordid origins of “Who Let The Dogs Out?” Seriously, that was one of the episodes, and it was great! They also talked to Vanessa Carlton about “A Thousand Miles”, which was written about someone she had a crush on at Julliard. Like Carly Simon, she’s never revealed who that person was, but the episode doesn’t even attempt to figure it out. Hell, I read an article a few months back that did a better dive into that, as they suspect it may have been It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia star Glenn Howerton. And that’s probably my biggest issue with the series: not enough digging. There was clearly more to the Carlton story, but it kinda boiled down to “I didn’t like who I became after fame, and it has taken me years to like that song again.” Yeah, but tell us about those years! Did you refuse to perform it? Were you strung out on crack? There’s a lot of money being left on the table here, and it feels like the real “meat” ended up on the cutting room floor. Still, there were some great anecdotes. For example, the success of Shaggy’s “It Wasn’t Me” was a fluke, because his label was getting ready to drop him, and they weren’t sending out more review copies to DJs. When a program director in Hawaii was unable to get the official track, he simply downloaded it off Napster, and added it in his rotation. And the song took off! To this day, no one knows who uploaded to Napster in the first place. So, good background noise, but don’t look for any real “investigative reporting”.
Trailer Park
Matlock (CBS, September 22)
It’s amazing how one line in this trailer took me from “Why the Hell did they make this?” to “I am going to be a devoted viewer of a CBS drama for the first time in almost 20 years.” You see, this was always billed as a “reboot”, in that the whole crux was that it was the Andy Griffith character, “but now it’s a woman!” Of course, a lot of us felt that would be a terrible, lazy idea. However, this is more accurately a “reimagining” – what they’re doing here is just borrowing the original Matlock‘s, let’s say, clout. It has name recognition. After that, all comparisons are kinda moot. Now, I usually hate when properties do this, but I’ll forgive it in this situation. When she introduces herself, with “You know, like the old TV show?”, that’s all I needed to hear. Now, some folks will see that line as it’s own “Somehow, Palpatine returned”, but I think it cleans the slate and lets us get on with what this show is about: After a certain point, senior citizens become somewhat invisible to society, and Maddie Matlock uses this to crack her cases. And how can you hate Kathy Bates? I’m actually really excited for this show now.
Will & Harper (Netflix, September 27)
Originally, this slot was going to Nightbitch, but it really didn’t grab me the way it did some people. This, however…this is right up my alley. I love Will Ferrell. LOVE him. I also love SNL history and trivia. That said, I had no clue this was even a thing til I saw it on the sidebar on YouTube. This looks really powerful, and I recognize that it won’t be for everyone, but I think it’s going to be an unforgettable experience.
A Minecraft Movie (Theaters, April 4, 2025)
Speaking of Will Ferrell, allow me to tell you a story. You see, the Anchorman we got and the Anchorman they filmed are two different animals. There’s a whole subplot with Amy Poehler that got cut out, but Hollywood was always looking for ways to make money in the early days of DVD, so the Best Buy edition of the film came packed with a bonus “movie”, Wake Up, Ron Burgundy!, which is something they cobbled together with all the deleted footage. Even as a hardcore fan of that franchise (I still listen to his weird podcast, for God’s sake), I watched it once and have never needed to revisit it. Well, I bring all that up because this looks like something they cobbled together from stuff cut out of the recent box office bomb Borderlands. Are any of these people stars other than out of shape Momoa? Like, am I supposed to recognize any of this cast? If so, they must be Influencers. That’s my blindspot. Anyway, looks like hot garbage, but kids might love it. They love Skibidi Toilet.
Talk Tuah Podcast
When Bobbi Althoff popped up with The Really Good Podcast, folks started calling her an “industry plant”, which I didn’t initially understand. After some research, the general gist is that she didn’t just “pop up out of nowhere”, because her connections were too good. Her rise wasn’t organic. She was a random woman who was awkwardly interviewing rappers. So, that’s a plant: someone who didn’t seemingly pay their dues. Well, I’m here to say that I’m leaning towards Haliey Welch, otherwise known as the “Hawk Tuah Girl” being an industry plant. Notice how her name is spelled? “Lie” is RIGHT THERE! Yes, there are the memes and she’s been mentioned on all the talk shows, but now she’s got a podcast, and her first guest is comedian/podcaster Whitney Cummings?
I was talking to a music industry friend of mine about her, and he informed me that she has actual management. I’m talking management to established stars. So, she was determined to take her “flash in the pan” viral moment and monetize it any way she could. The part that is sort of interesting to me, though, is she could actually turn into something big. To date, podcasts are a very “big city” concept, filled with their “New York humor”. At least the bigger ones. Sure, we live in a time when anyone can start a podcast (like, Remember That Show?, which can be found on all major platforms), but not everyone can have a successful podcast (PLEASE listen to Remember That Show?, which can be found on all major platforms). To the same podcast-listening folks, she was just some dingy broad joking about blowjobs. But she appeals to a certain part of the country that has been neglected by major podcasts. Plus, most folks didn’t really do a deep dive into her, but news outlets went back and interviewed folks in her hometown – including her granny – and everyone was PROUD of her viral moment. So, she could disappear overnight OR she could become the Joe Rogan to an ignored part of the country. Something to think about.
Things You Might Have Missed This Week
- It was announced that a One Tree Hill sequel series is being developed, with Hilarie Burton and Sophia Bush reprising their roles as Peyton and Brooke, respectively – which is interesting, since they used to co-host the OTH rewatch podcast Drama Queens with castmate Bethany Joy Lenz, until Burton suddenly quit the show suddenly a few months back. And Lenz wasn’t mentioned as joining the sequel…
- Sandman spinoff Dead Boy Detectives was canceled after one season at Netflix.
- The Robbie Williams biopic Better Man premiered at the Telluride Film Festival, where it was revealed the pop star was not de-aged for the film, but rather replaced with a CGI monkey. Yes, Robbie Williams throughout his entire biopic is portrayed by a motion capture CGI monkey.
- Since there are apparently no other male actors in Hollywood, it’s been reported that Josh Brolin has been offered the role of Hal Jordan in Max’s upcoming Lanterns series, which would mean he’d also be playing the character in related James Gunn DC projects.
- Netflix is reportedly developing a Twilight animated series. Yeah, because that’s a thing anybody wants…
- Confirming months long speculation, it was reported that Rob Lowe-starring 9-1-1: Lone Star will end on Fox, following its upcoming 5th season.
- Late to the standup comedy game, Peacock announced the upcoming live special Colin Jost & Michael Che Present: New York After Dark. The SNL writers will be performing standup, along with some of their favorite NYC comics.
- Linkin Park is back, with new leader singer Emily Armstrong, as well as new drummer Colin Brittain. They also announced a new tour, and album called From Zero. This is seven years after the suicide of former frontman Chester Bennington, which sidelined the band.
- The next cast of Dancing with the Stars looks like one confusing hodgepodge of folks, including Reginald Vel Johnson, Tori Spelling, and infamous scammer Anna Delvey?
- In the Masters of the Universe movie that’ll never be made, Alison Brie has nabbed the role of Evil-Lyn. Doesn’t bode well when the actor doesn’t know the name of the character they’ve been hired to portray. Ya see, in her original IG post, she spelled her hashtag “evillyne”…
A lot of people don’t remember the early 00s, before streaming and “Peak TV” became a concept, but that was a time when the fledgling FX cable network started making a name for itself. While it initially carried a bunch of Fox content, it started developing a reputation as “Fox, but on cable!” Now, Fox always had an edgy connotation to it, as it was The Fourth Network, and cultivated something of a “bad boy” image. I mean, it’s biggest success at launch was Married…with Children, which came to represent the company for years, much to the chagrin of Fox executives who were angling for a higher class demographic. So, those same execs eventually had to lean into the image Married… had cultivated, as it at least set them apart from the other 3 networks. Well, FX had this same sort of awakening, and they ventured into original programming. Now, there are a ton of shows I probably never knew about, but the one that really hit this home for me was Nip/Tuck. Nip/Tuck was a show that was constantly the topic of discussion because it was a sexy show about plastic surgeons who played God by remaking people into masterpieces, with a murder mystery subplot laid on top of all that. There was a lot of partial nudity, which was new for basic cable, but anyone who watched the show can tell you it probably wasn’t the nudity you wanted. No, 90% of it was Julian McMahon’s butt. Hey, good looking man, but not my type. The show had more than run out of steam by the end, and never quite made household names of McMahon, Dylan Walsh, John Hensley, or Kelly Carlson. It did, however, put creator Ryan Murphy on the map, which has blossomed into a very fruitful relationship between him and the network. Shows have come and gone, but that, to me, was the first “FX Show”. I bring this up because this week saw the premiere of the new comedy English Teacher, which feels like the return of the watercooler “FX Show”.
Created by – and starring – Brian Jordan Alvarez, English Teacher is a comedy about a gay high school teacher in Austin, TX. I didn’t really even know about the show 3 weeks ago, and then the ads hit, and hit, and hit. It already looked intriguing, but you didn’t get a lot of info from them. Is it primarily about the kids, a la Glee, or is it more about the staff? Even the English teacher’s sexuality isn’t revealed in the marketing, which is just fine, yet has a pivotal effect on the show itself. You see, the pilot revolves around a former parent’s complaint to the school board that the titular English Teacher, Evan Marquez, had kissed his partner in front of the students, which had reportedly caused distress for her son. So, right out of the gate, his sexuality becomes important, and you better understand why I described him as such. Throughout the episode, he talks with various coworkers, friends, and the now ex-partner, about how he should approach the situation. The interesting part to me is he doesn’t want to have to defend himself, but not because he’s offended, but rather he’s not sure he wants that to be his identity. When the hilarious gym teacher instructs him to tell the school board he’s a “proud gay man”, Mr. Marquez replies, “Well, I’m not really that proud…” He doesn’t want to be a poster child, but rather just live his life. Mr. Marquez isn’t a bold character, but rather the opposite. He’s scared of commitment, he doesn’t make big, sweeping life moves. He’d just rather blend into the background. In the end, he finds out that the way to “win” in life is to “play the game”. It’s a really interesting lesson that I don’t want to spoil here.
In the second ep, Mr. Marquez recruits an old drag friend to coach the boys football team on how to be women during the school’s Powderpuff Football tradition. When it starts, you just know it won’t end well, but you’re not really sure what will go wrong, nor how. Again, another enjoyable half hour of TV.
I haven’t really anticipated a show in quite some time, but this week added English Teacher and Matlock to the list. Seeing as one has started, and one has not, it’s pretty easy for me to declare that FX’s English Teacher had the West Week Ever.
Oh, and if you happen to be on the East Coast, tomorrow is the start of Retro Con, held in Oaks, PA. It’s a celebration of all things 80s and 90s, with toys, video games, comics, you name it! Plus there are a few celebrity guests, such as The Fall Guy himself, Lee Majors. I’ll be there tomorrow only (not signing. They wouldn’t agree to my rider), along with my Remember That Show? cohost, Adam. So say “Hi” if you’re there. I’ll be the guy in the NO MA’AM shirt. Yeah, you read that correctly.
