West Week Ever – 3/27/15

I totally wasted last Saturday, as I could’ve been watching new stuff, but instead I watched four movies I’d already seen. FOUR MOVIES! Yup, the day started with Die Hard, followed by Iron Man 3. Later that night, I caught A Million Ways To Die In The West, and capped it off with The Dark Knight. What can I say? I really like all of those movies. Anyway, I’ve really got nothing to add except for the fact that I still hate that ferry scene in The Dark Knight. It unnecessarily makes the movie longer.

Saturday, I also caught Sarah Silverman: We Are Miracles. I’m a Silverman fan, so I pretty much knew what to expect. Still, I found myself disappointed. I don’t know what it is, but I felt like I’d heard all of that material before. I’m pretty sure they weren’t the same jokes as Jesus Is Magic, so I’m not quite sure where I heard them, but it all sounded like old material. After the recent Aziz specials, followed by this, I’m really not winning in the standup department lately. Anyone got any suggestions?

Earlier this week, I finally watched HBO’s Behind The Candelabra. If you’ve never seen it, it’s the story of Scott Thorson’s relationship with Liberace during the final years of Liberace’s life. Michael Douglas was amazing as Liberace, who seemed like one creepy old son of a bitch. Meanwhile, Matt Damon was great as Thorson, and I can understand why it won as many awards as it did.  Looking back, I still don’t know how the general public convinced themselves that Liberace wasn’t gay, but I suppose it was a different and simpler time. Liberace and Paul Lynde…it’s like people only saw what they wanted to see with those two.

The other night, I finally watched Choke – a movie I’ve wanted to see for years. Based on a story by Chuck Palahniuk, and written and directed by Agent Coulson himself (Clark Gregg), the movie follows a sex addict (Sam Rockwell) who, while trying to care for his schizophrenic mother, discovers he may be a clone of Jesus. Meanwhile, he runs a scam where he pretends to choke in public places so that he can con his “saviors” into supporting his financial needs. Yeah, it’s kinda twisted, but it’s a great dark comedy. I highly recommend it. Plus, for you Community fans, if you’ve ever wanted to see Britta topless, this is your movie.

Speaking of Community, sure it won West Week Ever last week, but now that we’re 3 episodes in, something seems kinda off about it. I’m not sure if it’s the lost cast members or the new “network” it’s on, but it feels lacking. I think it’s the fault of Yahoo Screen. It’s just such a ghetto medium compared to Netflix or Amazon Instant Video, and it almost feels like UPN 2.0. Just look at the other shows on the “network”. Sin City Saints? That’s totally the kind of show that UPN would’ve cancelled after 5 episodes, only to be replaced by more Shasta McNasty. I’ll keep watching because, as far as new episodes of Community goes, Yahoo Screen’s the only game in town. I just hope they bolster their offerings with some quality programming to support what they already have with Community.

Meanwhile this week, Fox announced The X-Files would be coming back for a 6-episode special event. And if ratings are good, I’m sure there’ll be more. I’m not exactly what you’d call an X-Files superfan, but I did watch more than half of its run. I enjoyed it at the time, but I’m not really sure I was clamoring for more. If anything, this saddens me because it’s just more proof that Hollywood’s out of original ideas at the moment. People are constantly saying this, but when you go back and resurrect a show that’s been off the air for 13 years, you’re kinda proving their point. I wonder if they’ll retcon the last movie, as it seems like that killed a lot of people’s desire for more Mulder and Scully. I never saw it, so I’m only going off of scuttlebutt. Anyone care to weigh in on whether or not it was as bad as I’ve heard?

Speaking of crazy comebacks, it was announced yesterday that NBC ordered 13 episodes of <strong><em>Coach</strong></em> – the sequel to the 90s ABC show of the same name. Yes, Craig T. Nelson will once again play Coach Hayden Fox. Apparently, he’s retired and is his own son’s assistant coach at an Ivy League school in PA. I don’t even know what to make of this. First of all, I hate when shows switch networks. Second of all, is NBC <em>that</em> desperate? I mean, I loved Coach back in the day, but I don’t know if there’s a place for it in today’s TV landscape. Thoughts?

Yesterday, the cover leaked to Marvel’s Free Comic Book Day offering, The All-New, All-Different Avengers. On it, the post-Secret Wars team appears to be comprised of Iron Man, Vision, “She-Thor”, “Blaptain America”, Ms. Marvel, Nova, and Miles Morales’s Ultimate Spider-Man. It looks like The Diversity Crew to the rescue! A friend of mine online said that he believes that this will be the B-Team of Avengers, and I’m inclined to agree with him. There’s a good mix of young and veteran heroes, but I’m not sure if they’re “Avengers”. This reminds me of when Marvel created the All-New Ultimates, comprised of Miles, Cloak & Dagger, Black Widow, Kitty Pryde and Bombshell. It really should’ve been called Ultimate Runaways, but the Ultimates name carried more clout. Ms. Marvel, Miles, and Nova are clearly the next generation of heroes, but they’re not really on that level yet. So, maybe they’re being mentored by the veteran heroes. Despite Miles’s presence, I’m more surprised that Sam Wilson as Captain America and the female Thor are present post Secret Wars. I thought they’d be the first to go in a multiversal shakeup, but I guess they have staying power. People love to point out that “She-Thor’s” sales are higher than those of the Odinson, but I maintain that it’s due to the mystery surrounding her identity. That’s not to take away from the storytelling, as folks wouldn’t stick around if it weren’t up to par. Still, those numbers will drop once her identity is revealed, as this same scenario played out with Red Hulk. My problems with Sam as Cap have to do with the concept of “cowl rental”. My friend Jenn explains it much better than I could, but let’s just say that the “replacement hero” rarely fares well once everything is said and done. Anyway, luckily it’s a free book, so I’ll pick it up and see what all the fuss is about. I mean, I’ve pretty much vowed to read whatever Miles is in, so I’ll read it, but I’m not saying I’m optimistic about the whole thing.

In the world of music, Zayn Malik announced that he was leaving the boyband One Direction. As much of a boyband fan as I am, I’ve never really given the time of day to 1D. I’m not really sure why. I guess it’s because their songs aren’t really that catchy to me. I’m a bit of a boyband snob, and if your songs aren’t from Max Martin, then you haven’t made it yet. Teenage girls seem to be losing their shit over this news, but I didn’t even think Zayn was that important a member anyway. It’s not like Harry Styles quit! Anyway, 1D will be fine. Fellow UK boyband Westlife had a similar thing happen when Brian McFadden left the group in 2004, yet they continued on as a 4-piece up until 2012. So yes, Directioners – there is life after Zayn. Unless, of course, he was your favorite member. then, I guess you’re screwed…

Last week, I had the pleasure of joining the Nerd Lunch guys to discuss television series finales. This is a topic that’s near and dear to my heart, as I love me some TV and I love some series finales. I’ve heard before that a good series finale should equally satisfy longtime viewers, but also serve as a decent jumping-on point for the casual viewer. Which shows adhered to this tenet? Well, hop over to their site and give the show a listen!

We’re doing something a little different this week. You see, I was off work because I was out on paternity leave. As many of you probably know, my wife and I have been expecting a baby since about July, and this week was the due date. Well, last night came a moment I’ve been equally terrified of and excited for: at 7:20 PM, Evelyn Robyn West was born. Weighing in at a whopping 8 lbs and 7 ounces, she licks her lips like Heath Ledger’s Joker, she’s pink and kinda looks like the baby from Dinosaurs. But she’s all mine, and I know that my life won’t be the same from this day forth. Mommy and baby are doing well, though Daddy almost passed out several times. That’ll just be our little secret! So, since nothing will ever compare to this in my mind, little Evelyn West had the West Week Ever.