Avengers. My, my, my Avengers. It’s amazing that I held on for so long, through so much, and now that we have the big relaunches, and the band is back together, I just don’t care anymore. I love Tony Stark, and I like when he’s part of the team, but the whole Avengers Trinity means little to me. I don’t like Thor, and I don’t consider Cap to be “Jesus wrapped in a flag”, no matter how much they try to convince me that he is. I will say that I don’t consider a team to be “The Avengers” unless they have at least one of those 3 members on the roster. It doesn’t mean that I’d read the book, but I feel like that should be a charter requirement. That’s why I don’t feel that Luke Cage’s “New Avengers” deserve their name. Sure, they eventually got “Bucky Cap” on their side, but he’s a substitute Cap, like USAgent. If they had gotten War Machine, he still wouldn’t have been Iron Man. It’s not about the symbolism of the name/costume – what matters MOST is who is inside that suit (I have similar feelings about the DC Universe, but that’s for another time).
Stop playing dress-up, Dick. Don’t you have a hot alien to bang?
Luke’s team could’ve been the “Revengers”, “The Getbackers”, whatever, but nothing about them screamed “Avengers”. He kept the name because Cap had bestowed it upon them during a one-sided war, in which his side lost. Luke kept it out of symbolism, but it was clear to the world, and anyone who mattered, that Luke Cage’s team wasn’t The Avengers. There was no way in Hell they were gonna save you from the Skrulls. THAT’s what Avengers do. What did Luke’s team do? Well, his baby got replaced by an alien, and the book turned into Adventures in Babysitting, while he ended up having a heart attack. It was all like that bad season finale of Punky Brewster where she ended up back in the orphanage. Not Very Avengery.
Yeah, that’s the problem…
Now that the dust has settled, and Steveus Christ is back in action, there’s still no reason for Luke’s team. He clearly doesn’t play well with others, and his argument for not joining the “real” Avengers was that he didn’t want to be told what to do. Weren’t you in jail at one time, Luke? Aren’t you tired of rebelling against The Man? Shit could be worse! You’ve got your hot white wife and your halfy baby. Do you WANT to go back to jail, Luke? Would that be better for you?
You’re living The Dream, dude – Don’t mess this up!
Anyway, what do the “real” Avengers do? They sell him the mansion and let him run his own team. Bull and Shit. I can’t believe they’d let him have his own Avengers, in the same damn city, which allows him to do whatever he wants. That’s not how the Marvel Universe works. You want to be on your own, you move to California. Start up the Avengers West Coast again. There’s no damn way you’re gonna operate in New York City without oversight. Hell, the X-Men have been doing the multiple team thing for over 20 years and they STILL haven’t figured it out. And they’re dispatched by the same guy, from the same mansion/Alcatraz base. So how do the Avengers expect to pull it off? I feel like New Avengers, at this point, is just a money grab. Luke will eventually figure out Cap’s been babysitting him, making sure he doesn’t get in trouble. He’ll get all offended and finally walk, which will be just in time for the Super Infinity War which will bring both Avengers teams together, resulting in one canceled book, an overstaffed Avengers, and some new team spun out of it. Don’t know if I care to stick around for the ride any longer. I think I might be done.
