Cirque Du Soleil: The Official Sponsor Of Nail Salons Everywhere

Why is it that everytime I go to get a manicure, there’s fucking Cirque Du Soleil playing on a TV in the background?!! I swear, this has happened to me at SEVERAL different salons . Is there some nail-enhancing property that I don’t know about? Does research show that manicures are more successful if gawdy Vegas shows are playing in the vicinity? I think it’s gotta be the latter, ’cause these places also have a penchant for “Riverdance”. Are Asian manicurists all secretly longing for the lives of Vegas showgirls? The world may never know…

And before I get backlash, YES, these are ALL Asian establishments….Which begs the question: Why is there any Asian monopoly of the manicure industry? Jenn’s gonna tear me a new asshole for that one, but it’s a legitimate question….

Share